your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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