Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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