How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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