I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
