So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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