Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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