The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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