Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
