what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
