Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
