This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
