Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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