I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
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