after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
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