Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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