okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
