I don't usually arrange sex via text message
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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