I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
