Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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