We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
