The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize
