i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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