The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
