I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
