Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
