Sry I called you an 8
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize