I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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