I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
