we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
