why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
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