Pappa wants mamma naked
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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