I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
