this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize
