YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Randomize
