So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Randomize