Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
