is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
