i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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