i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
