At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
