the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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