We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Randomize
