Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize