thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize