I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
