I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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