a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
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