you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
