Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Randomize