Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
